Missing Lyrics

Goin' Down

Can't believe where I was led
They're gonna knock me in the head
I shoulda turned to run instead
And now it's really got me stumped
They're marking lines on my fat rump
I'd like to get my tummies pumped
I can't believe they eat my friends in town
Prime cuts and ground
Goin' Down

****
This song:
They'll be back to milk my teats
They'll be back to milk my teats
The time is nigh, oh where'd they go?
Hope they get here soon, I think I'm gonna blow

****
This song:
Don't buy the whole white milk
Don't buy the whole white milk
Please don't buy it
Don't buy the whole white milk
Don't buy the whole white milk
If you're on a diet

Look Out Here Comes the Farmer

Look out here comes the farmer
That's when I'm gonna loose
How I wish I could borrow someone else's moos

Sheep are warm, cute and cuddly
They live, 'cause they give you yarn
Cows are big and good tasting
And mess up the barn

I see all kinds of sorrow
Wish I'd been born a dog
Look out here comes the farmer
Oh, how I wish the farmer would never come

Horses get to have riders
Cows can get to be beef
Dogs play catch and roll-over
They don't get this grief

I see all kinds of sorrow
Wish I'd been born a dog
Look out here comes the farmer
Oh, how I wish the farmer would never come

Moo, I love you
Moo, I'd be a good pet!

I see all kinds of sorrow
Wish I'd been born a dog
Look out here comes the farmer
Oh, how I wish the farmer would never come

(*Moo-ve over Neil Diamond*)

Goin' Moo

Sock it to me...

Sittin' in the gutter with a saturated udder
And I wish I could deliver
But you know I really mean it
If I'm not milked in a minute
Then the farmer will regret it
Cause he'll find me in the morning, udderless, lying in the ground
I'm goin' moo
I'm goin' moo

Playing with the mare, the farmer really doesn't care
I wish that I was over there
But I forgot my little bell
And it's so hard to scream and yell
I'm soaking wet without a hope
And I knew I should have never left the herd, it's so absurd
Goin' moo
Goin' moo

Wish I had another calf
Then the farmer wouldn't laugh
I should have taken time to mate
Besides I got the picture straight
I couldn't find another date
I really need this extra weight
I wish that I could see the pasture now
How now brown cow
I'm goin' moo
I'm goin' moo

And now I see the herd I led
Across the field, just ahead
I should have been a horse instead
But then I'd be a lump of glue
I can't believe what farmer's do
I'd like to pump my udder, too
I can't believe they do this stuff around, this dirty town
I'm goin' moo
I'm goin' moo

I wish I milked before I left
I knew my farmer wasn't deft
Been here so long I feel stranded
Haven't even got branded
This gutter scene is gettin' old
My cheese is turnin' into mold
I hope I won't be here at night
I should have carried my flashlight
I only want to go on home 
I'll gladly leave this ditch alone
What a way to spend a night
If I don't blow I'll die of fright
The Guernsey taught me how to moo
But I can't cry a single tune
Wish that I was back there now
I'd stay there lookin' like a mama cow
But, I'm just a dumb Alderney
I know this has to be a dream
If could find a stack of hay
I'd never never ever lead astray 
I give you cream that's oh so fine
I'm goin' moo just one more time
Goin' moo
I'm goin' moo

Now my udder's gettin' tight
Hope everything will be all right
Flies are perching on my back
I'm just sittin' here wishin for a snack
I never really liked that barn
The farmer didn't give a darn
Just movin' slow and fancy free
He never bothered to feed me
Tending to the hogs and boars
Or sweeping up the kitchen floor
Doesn't notice that I left the pack
Or that I may not ever come back
I know I'll know a better time
I'm goin' moo, groovin', so bovine
Goin moo, I'm goin' moo
Back back back back to Hilshire Farms 
Back back back back down.
I'm goin' moo, help help help help help help....

Moo-vaca Fighter

Grazing left, grazing right
Moo-ves the rest Moo-vaca fights
Left in the pasture, out in the sun
He hoped the barn was open
Or he'd be well-done
And they moo-ve on, chew cud, give milk and make calves.

Saving pigs, saving sheep
Kills the cows, to give us beef
Left on the fields outside of town
He thought there was a farmer,
But no one was around
And they moo-ve on, chew cud, give milk and make calves.

Lonely lowes, lonely moos
Lonely eyes, the bovine dies
Lunch for the people
Dinner for their kids
Waiting for the hamburger
And steak and stew and ribs
And they moo-ve on, chew cud, give milk and make calves.

Moo Moo Nantucket

Oh, Moo Moo Nantucket she tried to kick the farmer
But she couldn't so she got milked
The milking relieved her
But she wasn't a big breeder
Until she found an udder one.

Oh, de leedle oh de lay, I love it here on the range
Come a ti yi yippie I would love it more if it changed
Oh, de leedle oh de lay, I love it here on the range
Come a ti yi yippie I would love it more if it changed

Oh, bessie with a collar, she was sure she found an answer
But it might take a little time
Playing follow the leader, she was sure to be a dinner
Because hamburger comes from bovines

Oh, de leedle oh de lay, I love it here on the range
Come a ti yi yippie I would love it more if it changed
Oh, de leedle oh de lay, I love it here on the range
Come a ti yi yippie I would love it more if it changed

See all the people runnin', runnin' from miles around
Everyone's thinking a different dish, see them all chow down

Well, I don't like to quarrel, but what about tomorrow
Will it be the same as the past?
I keep on hopin' that somethin' will happen
And I hope that the people fast!

Oh, de leedle oh de lay, I love it here on the range
Come a ti yi yippie I would love it more if it changed
Oh, de leedle oh de lay, I love it here on the range
Come a ti yi yippie I would love it more if it changed...

St. Mootthew

By Moochael Nesmith (or Michael Nesmooth)

 She wears a big ol' brass bell that hangs around her neck,
 She gives milk to a farmer with hands as cold as heck.
 And looking over pastures that she will never run,
 She calls herself St. Moothew, and she weighs half a ton.

 She stoops down to munch on grass or hay and then,
 She chews it up and swallows, throws it up again.
 Both the times she moo'ed was 'cause the milking wasn't done,
 She calls herself St. Moothew, and she weighs half a ton.

 Part of it is eating grass for every single meal,
 But most if it is weariness from standing up, in that stupid field.

 When she's sleeping standing up she might as well be dead,
 But tipping her would take a truck, or a just winch instead.
 Then standing in a land-fill she suddenly becomes,
 A cow that's named St. Moothew, and she weighs half a ton.

 Part of it is eating grass for every single meal,
 But most if it is weariness from standing up, in that stupid field.

 When she's sleeping standing up she might as well be dead,
 But tipping her would take a truck, or a just winch instead.
 Then standing in a land-fill she suddenly becomes,
 A cow that's named St. Moothew, and she weighs half a ton.